Happy Black History Month! Black History Month is definitely one of my favorite things about February as we take time as a nation (US) to show love and appreciation for our Black Kings and Queens, past and present. I love celebrating and highlighting my people so much that I just had to dedicate a post to us.
I have really debated about whether or not to drop this post centered around all my sisters, representing the color of the rainbow. I did not want to come off as being exclusive, like with a “you can’t sit with us”, mean girl attitude. But then I remembered my reason for writing this post in the first place. Personally, I have struggled with self-esteem growing up as a Black girl in a society that often overlooks and sometimes disregards Black girls of all shades while uplifting other girls. So, I am writing this letter to remind all my Black girls of how valuable we are. Being a Black girl is lit! So, sis, this one’s for you!
“Dear Black Girl,”
In a world that continually tears you down, there are a few things I hope you know and understand about yourself. So, let me list them out for you.
Sis, I hope you know…
- We are Beautiful.
I hope you know that you don’t have to be any particular shade to be beautiful. Your God-given, sun-kissed skin isn’t something to be ashamed of, but rather it’s something you should embrace and allow to be genuinely complimented. Don’t accept backhanded compliments like, “You pretty for a dark-skinned, light-skinned, or brown-skinned girl” or “your hair is pretty, is it yours?” Here’s another one, “you’re not loud or ghetto, like other Black girls.” These insults disguised as compliments don’t define you and shouldn’t be accepted.
Don’t feed into the brainwashing of colorism that is simply another way to cause division among us and has been used for centuries to build up unnecessary beef in our race. The whole thought that one complexion is better than the other isn’t it, queen. I mean think about it, only colored races act like we should all be the same shade.
There is no race on earth where every person is the exact same shade of whatever some people, a long time ago deemed to be appropriate. They created the divide which doesn’t stop with just shade, but continues to other features like comparing our lips, noses, butts and even our hair (curl pattern- kinky, curly, straight).
Know that all of your features make you beautiful. From your 3A curls to 4C kinks, full lips, and nose to your curvey hips, these features all make you beautiful. Flex them proudly! I mean come on, some wish they could bottle our essence. We (Black Queens) are often imitated by others, but NEVER duplicated. If we could sell our hips, lips, butts, and curly hair, we would all be rich. Never let anyone make you feel that you are not deserving of love and respect.
- We are Resilient.
Do you know how resilient we are? Even when we get knocked down, we don’t stay down for long. Being a double minority (Black and a woman) in this society ain’t an easy task, but we manage to handle things thrown at us and handle these things so gracefully. Women are strong already, but Black women are S-T-R-O-N-G. The way we bounce back after and through tough situations, shows how dope we really are. We work hard for what we want, and we do our best to make sure the ones we love do not go without. We have a survival instinct that pushes us to be great no matter the odds stacked against us.
The best way to describe our resilience is through two of my favorite quotes- “Nevertheless, she persisted” and “And yet I rise” (shout out the late Maya Angelou, a great example of a resilient Black woman). Let’s keep it real, our very resilience is the thing that we get bashed for. We get called angry. Like should we be laughing when our brothers, sons, husbands, fathers, boyfriends, and best friends are getting killed and caught up in a system that teaches them to hate themselves, both guys and girls? Nah. We have to be strong. We can’t be quiet and passive.
Keep pushing sis. Don’t allow other people to limit you and put you in a box and dim who you are.
- We are Smart and Innovative.
Now not only are we beautiful, but we possess brains too. Whether it is hitting the books, figuring out how to execute projects at work effectively, or working on other skills like doing hair, writing, or even starting a business, or yes, raising our babies, we know how to make moves. Don’t believe or feed into the narrative that Black girls are ghetto, ratchet, and uneducated. Isn’t there girls from all races that may act a little off sometimes? There are so many Black girls that are educated, both formally and informally. We work hard to gain knowledge by seeking help from our village, books, church, podcasts, and hopefully more increasingly counseling. Side note: Mental health MATTERS sis!
Despite what others may think, we have so many great ideas that we keep to ourselves. No sis, no more hiding your brain and talents. Show them off! No more playing small because we may not have as much as others. Hold your head up high with confidence and show the greatness you have inside of you. Share your talents with the world. Go hard for yourself whether or not anyone is backing you. Like actress Issa Rae said, “I’m rooting for everybody Black.” We have to support and be there for each other.
- We are SO Versatile.
Girl, you are versatile. Like sis, we can adapt and switch things up when we want. When I think about how versatile Black girls are, the first thing that comes to my mind is how we can switch up our beautiful crowns (hair).
We can go from rocking our natural hair to box braids to a straight wig to a curly sew-in, and we will slay every look. We are so creative in our hairstyles as we try new things. Each new hairstyle gives us the opportunity to show another part of ourselves. Don’t allow anyone to try to dictate how you should do your hair. Don’t listen to the false narrative that if you wear weave, that means you probably don’t have hair. It’s okay to keep putting in protective styles. Do what YOU want to do with your hair confidently. And if you want rock it low, do your thing!
- We are continuing to Grow and Blossom.
I hope you know that whether we get a lot of water or a little, we will continue to grow and prosper. With our survival instinct, it does not matter if we are thrown to the wolves, we will come back leading the pack. Sis, don’t be too hard on yourself as we continue to grow and glow. You got this. Like my mom always say, “one step at a time.”BREATHE. Remember who you are and take care of yourself.
If you don’t take anything else from this post, know that have that Black Girl Magic! Own it!
Love,
Ekaila
In the comments below, share what you love about yourself or race! We are all beautiful, no matter what color we are.
